Battles With Yourself
by Tropical Medlies
Summary: "This sounds exactly like a date, Fiona. It's like you and Becky are going on an actual date." One-shot.


"And over here is where we can set up the snacks table," Becky finished, pointing with her pen at the open space in front of her. Fiona nodded approvingly, bringing her clipboard up to her chest.

"Great job as usual, Becky," she said with a warm smile, touching Becky's shoulder before turning away to talk to some of the other members of the prom committee.

Somehow Becky Baker had gotten herself on the senior prom committee - out of sheer determination, really - and had immediately attached herself to Fiona. The older girl was surprised, to say the least, after hearing from Eli about how she had dropped out of the play because she couldn't "condone homosexuality," and considering Fiona was pretty much the gayest thing to walk the halls of Degrassi in years. Becky had yet to bring it up, and after a few days of just warily watching her and waiting for the day a pamphlet was tucked into her clipboard, Fiona let her guard down and found Becky to be surprisingly nice.

"Oh, Fiona?"

She turned around, studying something on her clipboard. "Yeah?"

Becky straightened, looking like she was on the verge of just not saying anything at all when she noticed how little attention Fiona was actually paying her. "I was just wondering if you would like to hang out outside of school sometime. This weekend, perhaps?"

It took Fiona a minute to finish scribbling something, and then she flipped the sheet of paper down before looking up at Becky. "Hang out? Sure. What do you have in mind?"

"The mall, maybe? I know it's not very exciting, but - "

"The mall is fine," Fiona cut her off, smiling. "Here, give me your phone so I can give you my number and you can text me the details." Becky obeyed, rummaging around in her bag before finding her phone and handing it over. As Fiona was programming her number in, Becky caught sight of Imogen Moreno entering the building and scanning the room for Fiona.

"I think you have a visitor," she said softly, pointing over Fiona's shoulder when the girl handed her back her phone. Fiona's eyebrows knitted together in confusion and she turned just in time to be tackled in a hug by Imogen.

"Fions!" Imogen squealed, and Fiona could only laugh, wrapping her arms around Imogen's neck as her girlfriend (who was slightly taller than her today, thanks to Fiona's short heels and Imogen's boots) hugged her tight around her middle.

Becky stood awkwardly by for a minute before realizing that this probably wasn't something she should have been watching. She tossed her phone back in her bag and quietly made her exit, hoping Fiona would text her first instead of the other way around.

—

"So she wants to hang out with you?" Imogen asked, her mouth full of Chinese food.

Fiona made a face and handed her a napkin across the table. "Is that really so hard to believe? I mean, some people do like to hang out with me and do things other than make out," she said pointedly, chopsticks poised over her lo mien. Imogen rolled her eyes.

"Shut up, you know that's not why I hang out with you." She paused to take a bit of her egg roll before continuing. "You also have a kickass DVD collection."

"Why do I even bother dating you?" Fiona groaned, although she knew exactly why. Even when Imogen was being a pain in the ass or they were having a little fight, she just had to take one really good look at her to remember why she fell for her in the first place. It must have been true love, because there was no way Fiona would have ever dated anyone else who decided to wear overalls at the age of eighteen.

"Seriously, though, Fiona. Why does she want to hang out with you?" Imogen wasn't the biggest fan of Fiona and Becky's new friendship. She hadn't heard good things about the girl at all - Jesus Freak, everyone called her - especially concerning anything having to do with being gay, so she was on red alert when it came to her. Fiona, evidently, didn't have the same concerns.

Fiona shrugged her shoulders and pushed her plate away. "Maybe she just wants friends? I don't think she really has any, aside from Jenna Middleton." At Imogen's pointed look, she sighed. "Immy, I'm sure it's nothing bad. I mean, she would have said something by now if she was uncomfortable. She definitely wouldn't be inviting me to hang out with her, alone."

Imogen stacked their plates together and stood up. "Well, don't come crying to me when you're stuck in one of those Homosexuals Anonymous support groups."

—

It wasn't until Saturday morning that Becky finally called Fiona. The phone buzzed on Fiona's nightstand, and she rolled over, squinting against the sun filtering in through the window. It was eight in the morning on a Saturday; who the hell was even awake, let alone making calls?

Imogen shifted on the other side of the bed, pulling her pillow over her head and yelling something at Fiona, the words muffled. She got the gist of it, though, and pressed the answer key on her phone. "What?"

"Um. This is Fiona Coyne, yes?"

Fiona stretched, rubbing her eye with the back of her hand, and tried to suppress a yawn. "Yeah."

"This is Becky. Becky Baker? I was just calling to see if you wanted to maybe go to the mall tonight? I hear that new Leonardo DiCaprio movie is premiering, so I figured we could get dinner and then see it?"

She flipped so that she was on her side, facing Imogen, who was lying on her stomach with the pillow still over her head. With a soft sigh, she reached out and touched her girlfriend's back, tracing the slope of her spine and then resting her hand on the small of her back. Imogen was already on the verge of falling asleep again, and she just barely turned her head to peek out from under the pillow at Fiona, eyes half-lidded.

"Fiona?"

She blinked, having momentarily forgotten she was even on the phone. "Oh! Right, yeah, that sounds fine. I'll meet you there at six?"

"Sounds great! Bye!"

Fiona hung up the phone and placed it back on the nightstand without looking behind her, and then scooted over so that she was right next to Imogen, their noses nearly touching. "Hi."

"Don't forget to say prayer before you eat dinner tonight," Imogen joked, voice scratchy with sleep, before she put her arm around Fiona's waist and buried her nose in the crook of her shoulder.

—

Fiona had to admit, after Imogen had dropped her off at the mall (Fiona still refused to get her license, and considering her family's financial state right now, she couldn't afford to be taking cabs all the time, so Imogen offered to drive her whenever she could) she was a little suspicious about this Becky thing. Imogen had seemed more suspicious than she was, actually, and more than once Fiona thought she had caught a glimpse of jealousy in Imogen's features when she was brought up. "This sounds exactly like a date, Fiona. It's like you and Becky are going on an actual date," Imogen had said. She shrugged it off, hoping that whatever it was would just blow over.

That was, until she stepped into the restaurant and found Becky sitting in one of the waiting chairs for her, hands folded primly in her lap like always. Before she could say a word, the blonde was up and out of her seat and folding Fiona in a hug. "Hi, Fiona!" she chirped, and Fiona patted her back.

"Hey, Becky."

There was another few seconds of awkward hugging until Fiona gently detached herself and Becky stepped away, touching her hair. "I already put our name in. Is that okay?"

"Yeah, that's fine." Fiona tried her hardest not to make it look like she was checking Becky out, but now that Imogen had planted the idea in her head it was pretty hard not to. What _was_ she up to? It definitely wasn't in character for her to act this way.

"Becky?" the hostess called, and Becky broke out in a grin.

"Here!" she called back, grabbing Fiona's hand and tugging her towards the podium. Fiona didn't even have time to react, going blindly with it until they reached their table, at which point Becky dropped her hand so she could take her seat on her side of the table.

Fiona didn't even hide the fact that she was staring at her this time, pulling out her chair and taking a seat. "So, um, Becky," she started, picking up her menu and trying to sound like she was just making normal conversation. "What made you decide to ask me out?" Oh, she had definitely meant to make it sound like that, just to gauge Becky's reaction.

Becky blushed. "Oh, I didn't - I mean, I wasn't - this isn't - you have Imogen, and I - Fiona…" she trailed off, before hiding in her menu, letting an awkward silence fall across the table. Fiona's eyebrows were raised now, and she propped her menu up, carefully texting under the table so that Becky wouldn't see her.

Fiona: _Becky totally thinks this is a date!_

Seconds later, the screen of her phone lit up.

Imogen: _I told you so._

Fiona: Now is not the time. What do I do?

Imogen: _When you kiss her goodnight, don't use too much tongue. You might not get a second date. _

Fiona scowled down at her phone. Of course Imogen would be completely useless right. She was probably giggling hysterically right now, imagining how uncomfortable Fiona was, and waiting for when she could pounce on her and gloat about how right she was.

Fiona: _I hate you. _

Imogen: _I love you, too. Now don't be a rude date and get back to your beloved! Oh, and remember to be classy. No sex until the third date!_

Fiona nearly snorted out loud, and when she looked up she found Becky watching her curiously, with just a hint of fear in her eyes. "Are you mad at me?" she blurted out, and Fiona found herself feeling bad for the girl.

"No, I'm not mad at you, Becky. Look, why don't you, uh, tell me why we're here, exactly?"

Becky bit her lip, twisting her fingers, toying with the rings that she had there. The waitress came over to take their orders, but both girls declined anything, saying that they needed more time. When she left, Becky spoke. "I'm just - I think I'm confused," she whispered, voice low so that no one could overhear them.

Fiona leaned forward so that she could hear her, elbows on the table. "Confused about what?"

There was a sigh from Becky. "I think I'm confused about - about how I feel about…you." She glanced away from Fiona, sitting back in her seat and clasping her hands in her lap. Fiona took a moment to just digest the information, to take it all in and try to figure out the best way to formulate a response.

"I'm really flattered Becky, and you know that I have Imogen, and that I love her, so why did you ask me here?"

Becky shrugged her shoulder, her normally prim-and-proper demeanor dropped. Fiona could finally see the normal sixteen-year-old girl that laid underneath her always smiling, always bubbly exterior. "I don't really know," she confessed. "I was just hoping that maybe you could help me. I can't - I don't want to feel like this. It's wrong."

Fiona sighed, rubbing her forehead. Of course. The Christian guilt thing. She didn't know how Becky thought she was going to help, of all people, considering she didn't adhere to any specific religion and she had been out and proud for two years now. "Becky, it's perfectly fine to be gay - "

"Don't _say _that!" Becky hissed, eyes darting around them, making sure no one had heard. "I'm not gay! I don't want to be gay, okay?"

Fiona held up her hands in surrender. "Okay, okay. I get how you're feeling. Maybe you're not. Maybe you're just confusing friendship for wanting to date me. Or maybe you do like me, but only me. Becky, sexuality is really confusing. You might find out in a few years' time that you want to date guys, or you might find out that you want to date girls, or you want to date both. Just - just don't stress about it now, okay?"

Becky had bristled when Fiona first started talking, opening her mouth to stop her, but Fiona just held up a hand around the time she said that Becky wanted to date her. Then she relaxed, looking slightly less panicked by the time Fiona finished. "I just can't feel like this. It goes against everything I've ever been taught, Fiona."

"And that's hard. I know. But don't beat yourself up about it. Just try and take it one day at a time and figure things out on your own schedule. Becky, this isn't the end of the world, okay? If you really are gay - " she cut herself off, looking apologetic. "Sorry. Anyhow, um, if you really are, then I'm sure you'll find a way to mesh your religion and who you want to date. If I remember the Bible correctly, Jesus never really said anything about being gay, but he did say something about loving and accepting everyone, so I think you're in the clear."

Becky studied Fiona's face for a minute and then sighed. "Imogen's a really lucky girl, you know that?"

Fiona smiled, shaking her head. "Do you know what you want to order yet?"

—

When they were done eating, they left the restaurant and Fiona realized that Imogen wasn't there to pick her up yet because she had texted her a little too late. Becky offered to stay with her until she arrived, but Fiona waved her off. "Don't worry, I'm sure she'll be here soon. You don't have to wait around with me."

Becky seemed to get the hint and nodded. "Alright. I had a nice time tonight, by the way. Thanks for, you know, not running away."

Fiona grinned at her. "I would never just run away." To show that she was totally comfortable with the situation, she held out her arms to give Becky a goodbye hug. When the girl moved forward to embrace her, she also went to kiss her on the cheek, except at the last minute Becky altered her course and went straight for Fiona's lips.

Fiona backed away instantly. "Whoa, Becky!" she said, hands raised.

Becky looked horrified, clutching onto her purse. "I am so sorry!" she squeaked, before turning around and nearly running to her car. Fiona watched her go with a sigh, Imogen pulling up in her car just then.

"Need a ride, hot stuff?" her girlfriend called through the window, a broad smile on her face.

—

"So she has a crush on you? How adorable! Are you guys going out again? Oh, can I help you pick out your outfit? You should wear that green top; it totally makes your boobs look great. Hey, maybe she'll let you get to second base!" Imogen wiggled her eyebrows, and Fiona rolled her eyes.

"Imogen, seriously. Your girlfriend went out with a girl who has a major crush on her, and you're joking around about helping her go on a second date?" She ran her fingers through Imogen's hair, and Imogen hummed, her head in Fiona's lap.

"That's just how I roll. I'm only trying to help you get some."

Fiona made a face. "Babe, you are so weird sometimes, you know that?"

"Yeah, but you know you like it." She rolled over so that she was facing Fiona, who plucked her glasses off her face so she could see her eyes better. "Becky's really having the ol' sexuality crisis though?"

Fiona nodded, a look of concern crossing her face. "Yeah. I feel bad for her. She's really struggling with it. She doesn't have it easy like we did. I mean, I figured it out with Adam, and then came right out. Then you kissed me, realized you were bi, and that was that. Becky, though, she has to deal with the religion thing, and her whole family is homophobic. Poor girl has everything in the world going against her."

Imogen sighed, reaching up to trail a finger along Fiona's jaw. "I hate to say it, but I think you should help her out. I mean, who else is she going to turn to?"

"Well, I'm definitely going to help her. It's just that, you know, she may have tried to…kiss me when we left the restaurant." Fiona's cheeks colored, and she bit her lip looking away from Imogen and up to the ceiling as if she hadn't said anything at all.

Imogen sprang up, staring at Fiona. "She tried to_ what_? Fiona Celestine Arabella Coyne, you look at me this instant!" Fiona guiltily brought her gaze back to Imogen, who had her arms crossed and was looking furious. "She tried to kiss you and you didn't think to bring this up until now? What is wrong with you? What happened?"

"In my defense, I didn't want to upset you! Look, we were just leaving, and it was before you got there and she was getting into her car, and we leaned in for a hug and a kiss on the cheek - a friendly one - and she moved over an inch and tried to kiss me on the lips and I moved away and she apologized and that was that!" Fiona ran a hand over her face, hoping that she hadn't igniting the wrath of Imogen. That was something to behold, and after she had witnessed it just once she never wanted to see it again.

Imogen clenched her teeth. "I take it back. You can't help her now!"

Fiona sighed, scooting over on the couch so that she and Imogen were touching again. She took her hand and kissed her knuckles before smiling at her. "You know she's just confused. I'm sure it won't happen again, alright?"

Imogen eyed her warily. "It better not or I'll have to kick some blonde ass."

—

On Monday, Becky completely avoided Fiona. Despite her best attempts, she couldn't seem to catch the blonde girl anywhere, although she did think that she saw just a flash of her rounding a corner between fourth and fifth period. She wasn't answering any of Fiona's texts, either, and she felt like giving up.

"Maybe she's just freaking out now. I mean, I would if I had tried to kiss you," Imogen said, leaning next to Fiona's locker as her girlfriend packed up for the day. "Well, no, I wouldn't freak out, since you'd never turn me down, but that's besides the point."

Fiona threw her a look. "You know, your cocky side isn't that cute unless we're about to make out. Take note."

"Duly noted, Fions."

She stuffed another book in her bag before pulling it over her shoulder. "Besides, why would Becky think I would judge her or anything? I mean, my track record with girls isn't exactly stellar, so it's not like I'm going to be going around school gossiping. Although I still don't understand why she chose to confide in me." Closing her locker, she turned away and fell in step with Imogen, glancing up at her girlfriend, who is a couple of inches taller than her today thanks to her boots.

"Well, maybe she just thought you were a trustworthy person? I mean, you do give off the vibe, as long as you're not making your bitch face." Sometimes Imogen was as helpful as a brick, Fiona thought, pushing open the doors to the school and squinting in the sudden sunlight.

"Thanks. I'll make sure to reign in the bitch face more often. I mean, really, with all of my stunning qualities it's incredible that you ever found it in your heart to date me." She rolled her eyes again, and Imogen took her hand, smiling cheerfully and leaning down to kiss her cheek.

"It's a burden, but it's my cross in life to bear. Now, about this Becky situation. Are you going to keep trying to talk to her?"

Fiona bit her lip, stopping abruptly near the fence of the basketball courts. She reached out to touch the long necklace Imogen was wearing that day, toying with it before replying. "I think so? I mean, she might not really want my help after all. I don't want to push her or anything. That's the worst thing you can do."

Imogen shrugged her shoulders, stilling Fiona's hand with her own. "Fions, just calm down. You're overthinking it. Just send her a text, let her know that you're here if you need to talk, and that's really all you can do for now. Chasing after her won't make it better. Okay?"

Fiona stared at Imogen for a long minute, then glanced away towards the boys playing basketball, shifting her weight from one foot to the other. A sigh escaped her, and she shook her head. "Why are you so _smart _sometimes? It's so unfair."

"I'm just that good," she said, looking smug. "Now, come on. If I recall correctly, you and I have a hot date with a new French film and some Thai food, so you better make good on that promise."

Fiona rolled her eyes, but allowed Imogen to tug her forward towards her car nonetheless. At least she'd always have her oddly perceptive girlfriend on her side when things got too confusing to handle. The Becky Thing (it warranted capital letters now) was going to stay stuck in the back of her mind, but worrying about it and blowing up Becky's phone wasn't going to solve anything. The other girl was probably going to come to some conclusion on her own time, and if she needed her, Fiona would be there.

Until then, she was going to snuggle with her girlfriend, watch _Les adieux a la reine, _and keep feeling ridiculously lucky - even Imogen was being a little too charmingly cocky for her own good lately.


End file.
